It’s Pride weekend in SF and today is my first trans march being out, and it feels really good.
I’m already falling behind in these blog posts. Since my last post, I’ve traveled to Philly for the Trans Health Conference, hosted Science, Neat in SF, and have just returned from an incredible biology conference in Raleigh. Life is good, and fast.
These past few weeks have also been full of changes on testosterone (most of which I talk about in the two videos). My favorite change was subtle. Ever since I returned from the Philippines, an overwhelming majority of people that I don’t know are reading me as male. It feels incredible.
Other changes in the last month or so:
– sweating way more when working out
– major breaking out
– officially never have to buy tampons again
– no more mood swings
– confidence up, and risk-taking up
– sex drive through the roof
– stronger. bigger. i’ve put on about 15 lbs since starting T
– it’s finally time to stop getting scanned by the TSA. The last trip through, the female
attendant wanted to rescan me bc I showed up female, and the male attendant wanted to
know if I was sure I didn’t have a necklace on. I assure him I was just wearing 4
– all my dress shirts don’t fit over my shoulders anymore (I feel like the hulk)
– the rare moments that I experience anger, it feels like I’m holding the gates back on a
pack of angry sled dogs with a toothpick
The Philly Trans Health Conference was one of the most life affirming events I’ve attended. Beyond the education and connection to resources, I met some incredible men that I hope will be friends for life. My opinions on surgery have shifted, I feel less alone in the struggle to figure out my path, and I feel empowered to be out and visible, especially after meeting many folks in STEM fields there who don’t have that option.
I presented my first conference talk at the Evolution conference. This last week in NC was also life affirming, although in a very different way. I met folks to collaborate with, found a lab I’m going to work really hard to join for my PhD, and am feeling confident as a guy in this field. I also attended the Women in Science lunch, as an ally. While I struggle with my own visibility in these spaces, I do not struggle with standing up for and starting conversations about women, POC, and LGBTQ folks in STEM.
When people ask me if I have support in my transition, the answer had been an overwhelming yes, with the exception of one person who drifted off the radar. Happy to report that that connection was rekindled, and now I can officially say that yes, every single person I have come out to is 100% on board.
Also, if anyone knows how to stop getting these black screens on my youtube videos, let me know.